WishBIG Instructor- Chris Zydel

Chris Zydel

Chris Zydel is an ahhhh-mazzzing teacher, artist, creative soul, and encourager. She focuses on teaching you to release your hang ups of blank canvas and blocked creativity to encourage you to be free and to be yourself - free to create, and to help others realize their potential. She offers a ton of workshops and studio time. She also runs a Expressive Arts Teacher Training course- for women only, that I adore...and will one day attend. She has worked on enlightening herself and understanding herself in a way that I sorta envy and definitely aspire to. And then she shares her life lessons with all...MY DREAM!

The Reason I'm a Bartender...for now...

 This is my awesome friend Xaine (Go to her site-NOW, you will be astounded by her talent)- an amazing Fiber Artist, super creative and talented in everyway; and-she's having a bad day today...ie: "I can't make it financially, I'm not good enough, I should just give up now,  I'll never make it" etc...

 I have these days A LOT. They're scary, debilitating  and sometimes brings on such a strong wave of depression, I won't even go into the Studio for days. WHY? What happens in our head that makes us do so well for so long and then in the blink of an eye we are so depressed we decide we'll never do anything with our lives and we may as well quit now. I know that when I have a bad night bar-tending or my bills are due, I  start thinking " If I wasn't such a crappy artist I wouldn't have to work at the bar" which continues into," I'll never make money, I'm not a real artist, I should quit now, I don't try hard enough"... which sends me into an even further decline of looking online and comparing my work to others work and getting jealous, and wishing and wanting, and not be as good as...which wastes DAYS. At the time I don't see that, but what I SHOULD be doing is CREATING THROUGH IT ALL!
 When I start feeling 'less than'- I need to get off my arse and get paint on my hands, or a pencil to some paper, and work through my pain, and self doubts. I have to force my way through that cloud of funk.

As for comparing myself to others- that should be a NO NO in all artists lives. I'm an orange your an apple- hell, usually i'm a cactus...not comparable- yet I do. Finding inspiration from other artists is awesome- being inspired to the point of jealousy or competition is CRAZY. I'll never make art like you- my soul is like a snowflake, a thumbprint...it's unique to me and even if I painted the same picture it would still not look exactly the same because it would have my art soul all over it.

 Yeah, so I'm not self employed yet, and I have to work another job to help out...but that should fuel me into wanting to work harder and prove to myself that I AM AN ARTIST! Sometime, part-time, quiet time, all the time... doesn't matter, I'm an Artist and as an ARTIST I have to MAKE. ART is MAKING AND DOING, not the done...not the product, and the more I make, the more options for others there are out there for some one to fall in love with, and want to purchase. I will forever more try to work through my depression instead of marinating in self loathing!!! That's a promise I'm making to me and you!

My Inner Child

  It's taken me until now to be okay with my inner child and to let her out, for a while I had completely forgotten about her! And now she's coming out to play a lot. I never realized how damaged I was, how hurt I was on the inside, how bruised and still wounded, but slowly I'm healing my inner girl-child and I'm doing better for it. I had to start with forgiving the badness and evil in my past. Just let it go. I had no control over it then, and I can't control it now. So why let it rattle around in my head and soul and continue to surprise attack me? I got rid of it. I am getting rid of all the darkness, an ongoing process I'm finding, but it's well worth it. I wake up most days with a smile on my face and a very light heart ready to be creative in everything I do. Journaling, painting, art journaling, yoga and love...and a very supportive group of awesome women, those are my secrets! I wake up, make sure everyone's taken care of or gotten off to school, and then I write my morning pages and do about 30 to 45 mins of yoga- all the while fending off a baby that thinks i'm giving pony rides. Then I play with Bama for a bit until she gets absorbed in her doll house and then I paint, sometimes for thirty minutes. sometimes ten. We play, then I paint...throughout the day. Then around lunchtime we eat then get JC at preschool. We run around for a bit then, snack time and paint time for me. By then my hubby comes home and usually takes everyone with him to get the older ones and I paint a bit more then get ready for work. Of course, this is an ideal day. Most days are filled with laundry, cooking, cleaning etc...but I still make time. Nap time is awesome! Nourishing my soul with art and yoga is making me a better person and mom. And it'll make you better too. Take care of you, you deserve it!

me at 3, being creative!