HappyTrees Studio

Oct 20, 2011

Coffee and Cigarettes

My favorite Vice

 I'm on the wagon...no big deal, no drinking, no whiskey, no beer, no wine. I can do it. I actually feel better and I'm sleeping better! My dreams are fresher, cleaner, more vivid...so are my thoughts. But smoky treats, ahhhh, they are so hard to put down. I love to smoke, I love the way it feels, it gives me something to do in my down time while my paint is drying...I stare off into the street lamps and let the smoke stream out of the corners of my mouth while I imagine and plan my next idea, big move, thing! I feel romantic and nostalgic, and so super old Hollywood cool when I smoke. And do you know what compliments my late night pot of coffee perfectly? Cigarettes. I want to quit. I want to not mourn the poison I'm filling my body with. But I do. I begin yoga teacher training in the spring, and even though I'm mentally and physically prepared for the adventure...my breath is not ready. It's not there. I get winded when I take a flight of stairs too quickly, and I exercise daily. I have to quit smoking...how can I teach Pranayama,when I can't even get through a whole breath?!? So my goal, before spring...is to quit, completely. I've had one ciggy in 5 days...but the late night coffee and acrylic seemed doomed without it. But NO MORE! I will fight the urge. wish me luck!


Lisa G. (Happy Mama) said...

You can do it!!!!

Stephanie said...

I just celebrated 13 months without a cigarette...it was the hardest thing I have ever done but I feel so free now. I wish you much strength...and when your your cigarette voice tries to tell you that "you can have just one, it will be ok"? well call her a fricking liar right then and there and tell her to shut-up. :)